


A prince, a horse, and the unknown

by DidiNyx



Series: 2018 Lams Fics [3]
Category: American Revolution RPF, Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate History, Apologies, Being Lost, Childhood Memories, Deal With It, Emotional Support, Flirting, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Humor, Friendship/Love, Hiding Medical Issues, Historical References, Horseback Riding, Hurt/Comfort, Hypothetical Scenario, Internal Conflict, John loves art, Kind of a sickfic, LGBTQ Themes, Lams - Freeform, Lilapsophobia, M/M, Male Friendship, Male Slash, Overworking, Past Character Death, Pets, Pining, Post-Relationship, Post-War, Puns & Word Play, Secret Crush, Self-Discovery, Self-Doubt, Sick Character, Touch-Starved, Touchy-Feely, Wishful Thinking, Workaholic, a lot of things arent canon, and i mean this by saying this isnt really based off of anything real that happened to my knowledge, angst is slight and at the end, at this point im adding tags just to add tags lmaoo, cuz im a nerd, gay thoughts, i had to google saddles no joke, i know for a fact john's appearance isnt accurate in here ok i like the musicals portrayal, i personally relate to alex throughout this whole thing, im a city gal i know nothing of horseback riding for real for real, john is just so gay, probably a few historical inaccuracies, some character analysis here and there yanno, theres like one or two slang words that ik werent used in the 1700s, this was mostly for fun anyways so, yes john has a horse named becky in this fight me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-04
Updated: 2018-03-04
Packaged: 2019-03-24 02:34:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,673
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13801554
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DidiNyx/pseuds/DidiNyx
Summary: Alex scoffed, though he smiled. "You're impossible.""Good. That means I'm doing my job.""As what? My chaperone?""As your dear friend.""As my dear, annoying friend," Alex corrected."I will make sure you fall of this horse," John said in a mockingly warning tone."That's fine, you'll catch me. I know you would."John's face heated, and he was glad his back faced Alexander, who was most likely smirking."...I guess you could say I fell for you."*-*John and Alex get lost, and Alex blames the horse. Plus you get character analysis sooo yanno.(Alternatively called "I blame Becky.")





	A prince, a horse, and the unknown

**Author's Note:**

> I've been soooo busy that I could barely work on a lot of things, but know that a much more detailed, multi chapter fic is going to be in this series hopefully within the next few months! I'm still working out the plot information, but it's been kind of hard, you know? For now have this mini fic :)
> 
> I was supposed to post this literally days ago lmao

"This better be good," Alex mumbled as John led him blindly (both literally and figuratively) outside their shared cabin.

"And _you_ better not be peeking," John said, hands still covering Alex's face. He found his dear friend's annoyance amusing and used his confusion as an advantage as he steered Alex around camp, being careful that neither of them ran into something. He looked up just in time to see Tilghman and Meade walk into view, probably getting ready to work on their next round of letters for General Washington. Tilghman frowned, mouthing _Why?_ before turning away.

"Woah, pause."

"Why, what happened?" Alex reached for John's wrist.

"Well, our fellow aides just gave us some sour looks."

Alex huffed. "Yeah, because you forced me away from work and now they have more letters to transcribe..."

John hummed, optimistic. "Not necessarily..." He could almost feel Alex frowning.

"How so?" the latter asked. "You didn't seriously plan this whole 'surprise,' did you?"

John grinned. "I won't confirm nor deny."

Alex mumbled something about distractions but obeyed John's controlling instructions. They finally reached just outside the camp's entrance, and John abruptly stopped, nearly tripping his shorter friend in the process.

"Great, it's been about a mile," Alex said sarcastically.

"Oh, hush," John chided. "Don't be upset, you're going to adore this surprise."

"I never doubted that," Alex said defensively. "I just want to know what's worth skipping valuable working time. Also, my legs hurt."

"We _can_ turn back, if you want..."

"I walked all the way here." Alex's tone softened for a moment. "What'cha got, John?"

"Open." John's hands left Alex's face and Alex stared in front of him.

"...John."

"Yes?"

"It's a horse."

John shoved him, gently but with enough force for Alex to sway on his feet. "Not just _any_ horse; I've had this here gal for years! She was a gift from my father. Been living in South Carolina for all her life, but I managed to bring her here- For a little while, of course. I wouldn't bare losing her to the war..."

Alex grinned, finding John's love for an animal adorable. "Well, she is a beauty," he said with an appreciative whistle.

It was true. The contrast of the horse's pale, snowlike coat and ebony mane was majestic, not to mention the grey-black specks along her strong, healthy body. Alex thought she kind of looked like John... The specks were like his freckles.

"What's her name?" Alex's hand hovered near the horse's neck, as if he wanted to touch her but was too afraid.

John blushed. "Becky."

Alex turned so fast his tied up ginger hair whipped in his face. "You're joking," he said, a grin slowly making its way on his face.

"I'm not."

Alex smirked. "Becky and Jacky, the iconic duo."

"Oh, shut up." John smiled and walked towards Becky, hand out as an invite to pet her. "Hey, girl," he said softly. "How've you been? You missed me? Has father been checking on you?"

Alex tried to hide his laughter.

"What? She's my homegirl. We've been together for years."

"How'd you even manage to get her here?"

"My dad...knows people."

"Hmm."

"You're making fun of me."

"Am not."

John huffed. "You're just jealous because I have the bestest horsey friend."

"'Bestest'?"

"I said that to get on your nerves."

Alex smiled. "Well, she sounds wonderful." He turned to Becky once more. "You took care of my boy all these years? I guess we're automatically friends, then." 

John blushed and gently grabbed Alex's wrist, who shot him an uneasy look. "Don't worry, she enjoys people, even strangers."

Alex hesitated, but let his palm gentle caress the horse's side. Becky's ears flicked in acknowledgement but otherwise remained in her nonchalant position. John watched in interest as Alex eyed the horse, as if expecting her to flee. His expression was uncharacteristically soft and vulnerable. Alex caught John's eye and shrugged. "Animals never have much interest in me."

John nodded. "You never had a pet before," he guessed.

Alex didn't answer but stroked Becky's coat once more. "She's...gentle."

John looked proud. "Yes, of course, I raised her."

Alex raised an eyebrow. "You did?"

"Yep. Used to be around the stables all the time, whenever I wasn't busy with my lessons and studies..." John recalled his childhood days, when he was so carefree and energetic. The southern warmth in the atmosphere, the sun shining brightly as he skipped along his mother's garden...

Now, as winter came closer and closer, he almost forgot how the sun even felt on his skin.

"You okay?" Alex asked suddenly, and John snapped out of his trance. "Yeah, I just... She reminded me of my, um, old life."

Alex nodded. "Back in South Carolina..."

"Yes.."

After a thoughtful pause, Alex asked "I did in fact enjoy this surprise... Is this all you wanted to show me?"

John grinned once more. "Nope. Ever been horseback ridin'?" he asked, exaggerating his slight southern accent.

For a split second, Alex looked shocked, maybe horrified. "...No, _that's_ a joke."

"Not at all..." He passed Alex to get onto Becky's saddle, whispering "-darling," in a teasing tone.

Alex scoffed. "Aren't we supposed to be on duty?"

John shrugged. "Washington encouraged us to do a variety of activities to stay sharp, correct?"

"...Yes, but-"

"Look, it's almost sunset anyways. One fifteen minute ride won't be so bad, could it?" He studied the dark circles under Alex's eyes and his pale skin that somehow got paler by the past couple of days. Heck, just the other day he pulled a John and walked into the door. If anyone needed a break, it was Alexander.

Alex still looked doubtful, brow furrowed as he appeared to be mentally calculating their odds.

" _Please_?" John begged with a little pout.

Alex couldn't help but smile and sighed defeatedly. "Fine, for a little bit."

"Great. You know how to get up?"

"Okay, now you're making fun of me."

John grinned, swiftly swinging his feet to the right so he was physically turned to Alex. "I'll lift you up."

As Alex found his footing on the stirrup and John easily pulled him up the rest of the way. John got himself situated on the horse and looked back to see Alex smirking.

"What?"

"...I have myself a die-hard country boy."

"And I have myself a Caribbean prince."

Alex blushed. "Did you even ask His Excellency if we could go?"

John rolled his eyes. "Of course I did. We all know if his little right-hand man went missing he'd interrogate every single aide and solider in this camp."

"You called me little."

"Who lifted you up again?"

Alex scoffed, though he smiled. "You're impossible."

"Good. That means I'm doing my job."

"As what? My chaperone?"

"As your dear friend."

"As my dear, annoying friend," Alex corrected.

"I will make sure you fall off this horse," John said in a mockingly warning tone.

"That's fine, you'll catch me. I know you would."

John's face heated, and he was glad his back faced Alexander, who was most likely smirking.

"...I guess you could say I fell for you."

Yep. That confirmed it.

"Well..." John trailed off.

"At lost for words?" Alex said in a singsong voice.

"...Again, neither confirming nor denying anything at this point."

Alex wrapped his arms around John's torso. "You know I'm right."

John tensed. Of course, he was expecting that; I mean, come on, if you're horseback riding with someone, they're going to- at some point- invade your personal space (more so than just being behind you). He anticipated it, even longed for it. Yet when Alex did finally touch him... He felt guilty, as if he must retreat, almost as if he deliberately planned it. And, John couldn't deny... He kind of did.

Alex sensed John's now distant mood. Confused and guilty, he pulled back, just for John to place his hands on his waist. Satisfied and not willing to push his luck, he obeyed and changed the subject in mercy. "Where we going?"

John shrugged. "Not too far. In fact, I thought we'd go about a mile or so around camp. Sound good?"

"Yes. Either way, I'd follow you anywhere."

"Well, you kind of have no choice anyway."

"Unless you wanna follow through and push me off Becky?"

John chuckled. "Yes, unless I do that."

The two began talking about anything they could think of to pass time- from complaints about the war to gossiping about their fellow aides and romanticising the day they fight some of their not-so loyal soldiers on Washington's staff. Alex continuously started mini-debates with wholehearted passion, and it got to the point where John politely nodded and just let Alex rant away. Sometimes it was just easier.

He ran out of breath quicker than usual. "And _so_ ," Alex said, panting. "The bottom line is that Lee's an idiot and the federal government kind of sucks right now."

"...Those are two different points, Alex."

Alex inhaled deeply, still calming his heart rate. "Yes, it was more of a summary."

John chuckled and mentioned training at the camp, resulting in Alex's frown. "I admit I still haven't done much sword fighting training..."

"No?" John asked. "Despite my many tips?"

"Ha, swords. Tips."

"That was unintentional."

Alex grinned. _Dork_ , John thought.

"So you mind if we did some one-on-one?"

Alex shrugged. "I don't see why not." He then met John's eye as the latter turned briefly to search his expression. "It'd be fun," Alex concludes sincerely.

John smiled and hummed with satisfaction.

* * *

 As more time passed, John scanned through the wooded areas Becky lead them to. He hummed softly to himself, finding peace within the nature- Something he no longer had time for. _Pity,_ he thought. _I wonder how much of this view I could sketch._

He was quite fond of art, especially when it captured scenes regarding nature. He recalled that he used to constantly draw, a simple hobby he did in his free time, especially when trying to avoid his law studies his father pressured on him. 

His brow furrowed as he tried to remember the last time he actually sketched anything. _How long has it been? Could I actually have time to sketch when we return..._

_We... Oh. Speaking of a nice view..._

It hit him, two revelations.

First: The last time he sketched was admittedly of Alexander. He seriously couldn't help it. Though the first thing John truly feel in love with when it came to Alex was his mind, his looks struck interest in John's heart since the day he laid eyes on him. He was just... gorgeous. His fiery spirit didn't match his petite figure, but John liked it that way; that you wouldn't expect him to get into any physical fights and yet he _did_. His hair definitely matched his personality when it came to color: Once again, fiery. Full of energy. Unpredictable. Uncontrolled. Determined.

With lean, sharp features and eyes that were always alert, he was John's very definition of perfect, charming. John recalled his previous words: _I have myself a Caribbean prince._

Second: Speaking of Alexander, he was uncharacteristically quiet.

John looked back to check on his friend (and, you know, to _check out_ too) who was, like John, eyeing the forest with curiosity and delight. His eyes sparkled as he appeared to analyze every color, pattern, and sound the area could offer. Alex had always been so brilliantly observant and it continued to amaze John, who genuinely wanted to step inside his friend's mind to see what really went down in there.

_Wishful thinking._

Alex met John's eye suddenly and smiled as a brief look of panic flashed in John's face. He managed to compose himself and smiled back, praying he wouldn't make anything more awkward. John looked away and tried to focus on the sight once more rather than Alex's eyes glued to him or Alex's delicate fingers absentmindedly tapping John's hip.

 _This is driving me insane but please don't stop,_ he found his mind thinking.

"How long has it been?" Alex asked suddenly.

John nearly jumped, and he was positive Alex was aware. "I'd say ten minutes?"

"Yeah. I kind of changed my mind... We could probably stay a little more."

"Okay, but it will still take us a while to get back to camp and it _is_ sunset."

"I know... But if the His Excellency is okay with us out here I'm sure it won't be such a big deal."

"I guess you're right. Plus, if not..." He turned to Alex with a smirk. "You're very convincing."

Alex beamed at the compliment. "Indeed I am. Plus, we're his favorites."

John grunted. "More like _you_ are."

"Hey, he's fond of you too."

"He's also fond of his dog."

"John," Alex chided with a chuckle, and John shrugged.

"Reminder I'm still just a volunteer soldier. A rich one."

Alex frowned and John saw it in his eyes that he was organizing his next protest. "Yes, but-"

Becky suddenly raced forward so abruptly John had to grab the reins tightly in order to avoid falling sideways. "Woah!" John cried. "Easy girl!"

Alex had already wrapped his arms tightly around John's waist, leaning so close that the side of his head brushed against John's. "W-What's going on!?"

"Good question," John muttered as he tried to control the horse. "Becky, calm d-"

She jumped over a log, resulting in Alex yelping.

 _Oh yeah_ , John thought. _This is one of his first times horseback riding...Great._

"C-can you control her!?"

" _Working_ on it," John said, pulling at the reins with slightly more force. "Becky- hon- calm down. You're f-Ah!"

Another bump almost knocked John off the saddle. Tree after tree, bush after bush, turn after turn... They covered more ground by the second, and Becky wasn't slowing down.

"She's, um, usually not like this?" John met Alex's frightened face before quickly looking back. The horse nearly ran into a tree and Alex whimpered, burying his head in John's shoulder. "I thought this would be fun," came his muffled comment.

John bit his lip. _Please don't fail me now..._ "Hey!" 

He felt Becky hesitate.

"Yes! Yes. Good girl, yes, just slow down, it's okay..." He pulled once more.

Becky gradually slowed down as John tried to calm his voice, whispering encouraging words like "That's right, steady now," and "Good girl, we're almost there."

Alex still hadn't released his tight hold around John.

Soon Becky was trotting at a reasonable pace. John let out a relieved sigh. "Whew, okay, that happened..."

"Did she sense something?"

"Most likely, yeah- I mean she wouldn't just run like that." John thought for a second. "Really, it could be anything. Maybe she sensed another animal. I remember my friend Martha's horse... He was scared of birds."

Alex considered this. "Okay, but has Becky ever acted this way before?"

"Well... No... not really."

Alex made a humming sound. "That's odd. And you said you trained her." It was more of an observation than a retort.

"Well, yes... Before I got so caught up in my studies and joined the war. It _has_ been awhile... I don't know if anything has changed."

"You don't think..." Alex had to catch his breath. "She sensed someone on patrol, perhaps?"

John's eyes widened at the idea. "You mean... like an enemy."

"Precisely."

John glared at nothing in particular. "That wouldn't be okay," he said grimly. Another thought occurred. "Oh, no."

"What?"

"Well, I have no idea how far away from camp. Also... Didn't Becky turn at least once."

Alex's eyes widened. "We're..."

The silence drifted between them. _Lost._ No, John didn't want to admit that...

John cursed under his breath, turning Becky around. "Well, it's getting late. Soon it should be night. We should still find camp easily, it's not like we're too off the border."

"Yes, and like you mentioned, it's late. And we still don't know what danger Becky sensed. We're barely armed." John glanced at Alex's pocket knife and nodded. 

"True."

"...I do not believe it's wise to camp out here-"

"-Not that we can."

"Right."

"It's settled then," John said. "We have no choice. Let's continue on and try to get home."

Home. The word was so foreign, yet oddly not far away now that Alex was with him.

He made Becky speed up, carefully observing their area, trying to deduce if they passed anything familiar on the way. Everything looked the same. "Keep look out with me," John suggested. "You're better anyways."

Alex frowned at that general comparison but obeyed. John didn't notice at first, but Alex was shivering in spite of it being fairly warm outside, and he kept swallowing hard as if nervous. John felt that Alex was still tense, continuing to tap the former lightly, maybe trying to ground himself after the shocking turn of events.

Soon Alex began to cough.

This time John frowned. "Are you... cold?" 

Alex took awhile to recover. "I'm fine."

"You look exhausted. Well, more so than usual."

Alex blushed and looked away. "I'm fine," he said stubbornly.

John made Becky stop and swung himself off the saddle.

"What are you..." He paused as John took off his own jacket. "Take it," he said, already forcing it on Alex without hearing a reply.

"But..." He let himself get dressed by John and crossed his arms- In both annoyance and to get warm.

"You didn't..." Alex trailed off once more, stunningly at loss for words.

John gave him a careful smile. "I promised you my friendship."

Alex opened his mouth to speak but John continued: "I owe you one. The last few minutes have sucked."

He could admit that...

Alex recovered quickly. "Well...It was unpredictable. Unplanned, yes. But you know me..." He looked up to meet John's gaze and winked. "I'm up for adventure."

John nearly choked but snapped out of it when Alex returned to coughing.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

Alex nodded but didn't reply. His energy was dulled- Not peaceful and calm like he was on the horseback ride before, but tired and weary...

John pressed the back of his hand to Alex's forehead. Alex sharply inhaled.

"You're sick." The realization hit.

"Oh..."

"Surprise?" Alex asked, voice rough from coughing too hard.

John facepalmed. "I'm an idiot!"

The sudden outburst made Alex jump.

"The paleness, swaying on your feet, your silence, nervousness, the dark circles under your eyes.... Of _course_. You're sick. You've overworked yourself and I didn't even notice you were-"

"Wow," Alex interrupted with a slight chuckle. "I really _am_ better at this than you."

John colored. "You didn't tell me."

Alex rolled his eyes but winced straight afterwards. "Well, you _did_ notice. You just... didn't think about it."

John muttered about stubborn friends and got back on the horse. "As soon as we're back you're going to the infirmary. Then you're going straight to bed."

"Okay, mother."

John paused, taken aback. Alex immediately regretted it after he processed the meaning of his own words.

It had been true his mother had said close to the same thing all those years ago... Alex bit his tongue to prevent himself from any more damage. He knew his words could cut down, and he didn't need to remind himself of the pain of the past... Or to remind John.

"...I'm sorry."

John grabbed Alex's hand, a reminder of his loyalty and support. "I am too."

Alex smiled, squeezing John's hand in acknowledgement. "I personally blame Becky."

John laughed. "Alex-"

"You cannot convince me otherwise." And like that, Alex rested his own head on John with a knowing smile- Knowing that he won.

John could admit that.

* * *

The sky got darker, and John paid extra attention to every detail. It was extremely hard now, everything looked the same and John could barely make sense of blurred outlines. He also didn't have the advantage of being friends with the most observant person he knew, for he let Alex close his eyes and nap on his shoulder. He went out pretty quickly, and John bit his lip. If anything happened to Alex, it was his fault. He had to get them back soon...

Alex mumbled in his sleep.

John didn't know when he started paying attention, but he listened to some of Alex's words. Most were unintelligible, but there were certain words he caught both in English and French: Sorry, sick, mother, help...

And John.

John inhaled sharply. It was unnerving. He had wished to be inside Alex's mind... And now, as Alex unconsciously mumbled under his breath in his sleep, the puzzle that was Alex was unintentionally making itself known. He got his wish, but... 

The words kept reoccurring until John swore that's all he was able to say. It broke John's heart, hearing Alex was so vulnerable, confused, and guilty all at once. 

Except there was something else when Alex mumbled John's name... Something more firm and certain. He seemed almost calm and at peace- Like the rainbow after the storm. Out of all people, John happened to be the one to share this intimate moment with Alexander, and _his_ name was being said...

He could've sworn he heard "want" at least once, though John wasn't sure what Alex could possibly want now, at this very moment.

"John..." Alex mumbled softly again, and John's eyes immediately darted to the sleeping figure. It was totally different from seeing him awake, except for the fact that Alex always looked angelic- at least in John's eyes. He looked at peace, and the soft, quiet, timid voice that addressed John only made him certain that he did, in fact, love this man. 

 _That's what it is. Loving._ Alex's tone was loving.

John smiled sincerely. "Yes?" he asked quietly, though he wasn't expecting any response.

The silence was okay. He could live with the silence...

As long as _Alex_ is okay.

John felt a tug at his sleeve. Alex _did_ respond: "Am I... still your Carribean prince?"

He turned to his friend. "Mine forever."

John relaxed into Alex's embrace.

**Author's Note:**

> queennyxie.tumblr.com if ya wanna holla at me
> 
> Like usual, if you want sources or information about any historical references, I'll gladly explain :)
> 
> stg i need to make an Alex pov someday lmao


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